“When you say yes to others, make sure you are not saying no to yourself.” ~Paulo Coelho I grew up as the first-born daughter—the responsible one, the helper, the one who didn’t want to cause trouble. I learned early how to be “good.” Good meant quiet. Good meant easy. Good meant not needing much. What I didn’t realize then was that…
“Sometimes people wound us because they’re wounded and tell us we’re broken because that’s how they feel, but we don’t have to believe them.” ~Lori Deschene Age and healing don’t make you invulnerable to moments that can bring you back to the kind of trauma you experienced as a child. It doesn’t mean that you’re broken, but that there…
“Forgiveness is a painful and difficult process. It’s not something that happens overnight. It’s an evolution of the heart.” ~Sue Monk Kidd Sometimes I hear the word “forgiveness” and I cringe. I’ve been wrestling with this all year because I realized something really uncomfortable: When I look back at those moments where I felt betrayed, in most instances, I…
“Highly sensitive people are too often perceived as weaklings or damaged goods. To feel intensely is not a symptom of weakness, it is the trademark of the truly alive and compassionate.” ~Anthon St. Maarten There are some words that get painfully etched into our memories as if with a red-hot poker. For me, growing up, those words were “you’re…
“If there is no peace in the minds of individuals, how can there be peace in the world? Make peace in your own mind first.” ~S. N. Goenka I recently completed my third Vipassana meditation course. There is a moment at the beginning of the course when you surrender your phone (and receive it back at the end). That transition…
“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” ~Ian Maclaren A friend recently told me a story about her mother that stayed with me. They walk together some evenings around her mom’s apartment building—part exercise, part ritual. Her mom doesn’t enjoy small talk. When they pass people in the building, she usually keeps her eyes forward….
“The opposite of belonging is not isolation—it’s fitting in.” ~Brené Brown One of my earliest memories comes from kindergarten. My mom had bought me a new pair of navy-blue corduroy pants for an event at school. We didn’t get new clothes often, so this felt important. But what stayed with me wasn’t the pants themselves or the event—it was…
“I don’t believe people are looking for the meaning of life as much as they are looking for the experience of being alive.” ~Joseph Campbell I was sitting on my yoga mat with my legs stretched out in front of me. I bent forward into a fold, puffing and clenching my jaw as I extended my fingertips toward my…
“What will mess you up most in life is the picture in your head of how it is supposed to be.” ~Unknown I expected to get into college. I expected to have a career after a lot of hard work, and that one day I’d meet a nice man and we would get married. We would buy our first…
“You teach people how to treat you by what you allow, what you stop, and what you reinforce.” ~Tony Gaskins It was a Tuesday afternoon when I said the word that saved my sanity: “No.” Just two letters. But the weight I’d been carrying for twenty-eight years finally lifted. My phone was ringing. Again. It was my cousin, and…
