“You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats, so you can know who you are.” ~Maya Angelou There was a time in my life when everything felt heavy, like I was constantly carrying around a weight that no one else could see. I wasn’t in a…
“The body keeps the score. If the memory of trauma is encoded in the viscera, in heartbreaking and gut-wrenching sensations, then our first priority is to help people ‘feel’ what their bodies are telling them.” ~Bessel van der Kolk I used to think my body was a liar. Because how can something that’s supposed to be wise also be…
“Children learn more from what you are than what you teach.” ~W.E.B. Du Bois I was standing at the service bar, waiting for my drink order to be ready. The scent of steak fat clinging to my apron and infusing itself into my bra, while twenty-something servers around me whined about working on Mother’s Day… yet I was the only mother…
“To let go does not mean to get rid of. To let go means to let be.” ~Jack Kornfield I must admit right off the bat—as a serial entrepreneur, I’m a risk-taker. Throughout my twenties and thirties, I jumped at opportunities without always vetting the characters involved or asking what six months down the road might look like. I…
“You can’t calm the storm, so stop trying. What you can do is calm yourself. The storm will pass.” ~Timber Hawkeye Overwhelm doesn’t always knock politely. Sometimes it crashes into my day like an unexpected storm—suddenly I can’t think straight, and everything feels urgent, impossible, and too loud. One minute I’m fine, the next I’m spiraling in my head,…
“Being present for your own life is the most radical act of self-compassion you can offer yourself.” ~Sylvia Boorstein In 2004, I experienced a powerful breakthrough in understanding what it meant to love myself. I could finally understand that self-love is about the relationship that you have with yourself, and that relationship is expressed in how you speak to…
“The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance.” ~Alan Watts I must admit, dear reader, that I wasn’t always a fan of change—not even a little. I wouldn’t say I entered this world naturally inclined toward new or unfamiliar things. Like many children, I found comfort…
“You can’t heal what you won’t allow yourself to feel.” ~Unknown I used to act strong all the time. On the outside, I looked like I had it all together. I was competent, composed, and capable. I was the one other people came to for advice or support. The stickiness was that my version of strength created distance. I…
“Faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase.” ~Martin Luther King Jr. My grandmother passed away a few years ago after a long battle with cancer. Even as her health deteriorated, she never lost her spirit. She’d still get excited about whether the Pittsburgh Steelers might finally have a decent season after Ben…
“Strive not to be a success, but rather to be of value.” ~Albert Einstein, adapted I often feel like I was born into the wrong story. I grew up in a time when success meant something quieter. My father was a public school music teacher. We didn’t have much, but there was a dignity in how he carried himself….
