Once You See the Relationship Pattern, You Can’t Unsee It

“When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.” ~Maya Angelou The weekend started like any other family visit. Our family was in town, and it began with real excitement. Kids running everywhere, chocolate chip muffins in the oven, homemade ice cream for our guests, the ordinary, happy chaos of everyone existing in the same space….

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Why It’s So Hard to Just Rest and Why We Need to Do It

“If you don’t give your mind and body a break, you’ll break. Stop pushing yourself through pain and exhaustion and take care of your needs.” ~Lori Deschene In November of 2021, my autoimmune issues flared up. My doctor and I are still unsure which of my conditions—rheumatoid arthritis or fibromyalgia—was the culprit, or if they were acting in cahoots,…

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The Day I Realized Love Couldn’t Save Someone

“When it comes down to it, that’s what life is all about: showing up for the people you love, again and again, until you can’t show up anymore.” ~Rebecca Walker The first time my dad admitted he was scared, I felt something shift inside me. Not uncomfortable. Not worried. Scared. He had recently been diagnosed with Stage IV colorectal…

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How I Learned to Be More Present Without Meditating

“The present moment is filled with joy and happiness. If you are attentive, you will see it.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh A few years ago, I moved to a new country with two children under two. The idea had felt exciting at first—a fresh start, a new place, a life by the sea. But excitement fades quickly when you realize you…

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Healing Is Happening Even When You Can’t See It

“One never notices what has been done; one can only see what remains to be done.” ~Marie Curie I almost didn’t go to my cousin’s wedding. Not because I didn’t want to celebrate her. I did. But the thought of walking into a room full of people who knew the version of me from two years ago felt unbearable….

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Sometimes Love Needs to Move

“It may be that when we no longer know what to do, we have come to our real work, and when we no longer know which way to go, we have begun our real journey.” ~Wendell Berry I was watching television one night when something on the screen made me set everything aside and go still. It was a…

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The 7 Types of Overthinking That Drain Your Energy

Many years ago, I clearly remember celebrating a strange victory. I had only spent one day overthinking a problem. I was triggered by the end of another situationship. I could feel them pulling away. Something had changed, but I didn’t have the answers. I was stuck in that painful limbo space. For that day, I had done what I…

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