“There are wounds that never show on the body that are deeper and more hurtful than anything that bleeds.” ~Laurell K. Hamilton My older sister had four years over me. As a kid, I worshipped the ground she walked on. She was so smart, so pretty, so cool. I wanted to be wherever she was, doing whatever she was…
“Music gives color to the air of the moment.” ~Karl Lagerfeld I used to think I was a good listener. I could hold eye contact, nod at the right moments, ask thoughtful follow-up questions. But one afternoon, sitting cross-legged on a yoga mat in a small studio in Rishikesh, I realized I had never truly listened to anything, not…
“The wound is the place where the light enters you.” ~Rumi I grew up in a council house in the 1970s, in a world where children were seen and not heard. We were kicked out in the morning and told to come back when the streetlights came on. On the surface, it looked normal. But what was happening behind…
“Only when we realize that our time is limited do we begin to appreciate the value of every single day.” ~Elisabeth Kübler-Ross I didn’t expect the trip to begin the way it did. In December 2003, I decided to take a holiday over Christmas. I booked an eco-tour of Sri Lanka, traveling around the country and staying in different…
“The most common form of despair is not being who you are.” ~Søren Kierkegaard A few years ago, I was catching up over coffee with an old friend I’ll call Ray, a trusted mentor. He’s a few years older than me, silver-haired and down to earth, the kind of man who listens with his whole heart. We were at…
“The biggest adventure you can take is to live the life of your dreams.” ~Oprah Winfrey My father died at forty-nine. I was young when it happened, still soft in the way grief makes you when you are not yet equipped to hold it. I was so consumed by the loss itself that I never stopped to do the…
“Nostalgia is a file that removes the rough edges from the good old days.” ~Doug Larson I don’t miss Zinia. I miss the Zinia I made up. The real Zinia—the one who fought with me for hours over things that became bigger than they should have, who said things I told myself I’d never forgive, who was wrong for…
“Sticking with uncertainty is how we learn to relax in the midst of chaos, how we learn to be cool when the ground beneath us suddenly disappears.” ~Pema Chödrön Evicted. The word stared up at me from the letter in my hands. It was the summer of 2022, near the tail end of the Covid pandemic, when life was…
“When we avoid difficult conversations, we trade short-term discomfort for long-term dysfunction.” ~Peter Bromberg Have you ever looked around at other people’s lives and wondered, “How do they do that?” How do they seem so steady, so connected, so… together? From where I stood, there appeared to be a certain kind of person—someone confident, kind, thoughtful, and at ease…
“Some of us think holding on makes us strong, but sometimes it is letting go.” ~Hermann Hesse My dad was intubated, so he couldn’t say the words back to me. I told him I loved him anyway. Instead, he slowly pointed to himself and then to me. “You love me too?” I asked. His eyes widened ever so slightly,…
