“When it comes down to it, that’s what life is all about: showing up for the people you love, again and again, until you can’t show up anymore.” ~Rebecca Walker The first time my dad admitted he was scared, I felt something shift inside me. Not uncomfortable. Not worried. Scared. He had recently been diagnosed with Stage IV colorectal…
“Better than a thousand useless words is one useful word, upon hearing which one attains peace.” ~Buddha, Dhammapada Did he just cut the side of my head open? Am I bleeding out everywhere? Is there blood rushing down my face and onto the floor? It was the middle of my standard biweekly haircut when my mind suddenly began to…
“The present moment is filled with joy and happiness. If you are attentive, you will see it.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh A few years ago, I moved to a new country with two children under two. The idea had felt exciting at first—a fresh start, a new place, a life by the sea. But excitement fades quickly when you realize you…
“One never notices what has been done; one can only see what remains to be done.” ~Marie Curie I almost didn’t go to my cousin’s wedding. Not because I didn’t want to celebrate her. I did. But the thought of walking into a room full of people who knew the version of me from two years ago felt unbearable….
“True love is born from understanding.” ~Buddha I believe one of our strongest desires in life is to feel understood. We want to know that people see our good intentions and not only get where we’re coming from but get us. We want to know they see us. They recognize the thoughts, feelings, and struggles that underlie our choices,…
“It may be that when we no longer know what to do, we have come to our real work, and when we no longer know which way to go, we have begun our real journey.” ~Wendell Berry I was watching television one night when something on the screen made me set everything aside and go still. It was a…
Many years ago, I clearly remember celebrating a strange victory. I had only spent one day overthinking a problem. I was triggered by the end of another situationship. I could feel them pulling away. Something had changed, but I didn’t have the answers. I was stuck in that painful limbo space. For that day, I had done what I…
“The heart that’s been through the most can sometimes mistake chaos for connection.” ~Unknown I remember the exact moment I knew something was wrong. We had been talking for three weeks. Every conversation left me either floating or deflated, never just… okay. Either he said something that made me feel like the most understood person on earth or he…
“Expectation is the root of all heartache.” ~William Shakespeare I turned forty this year. And I am only now figuring out something I wish someone had told me at twenty. Most of my pain—the kind that sat in my chest for days, the kind that made me replay conversations at 2 a.m., the kind that made me wonder what…
I used to think I was just bad at coping with stress. Every Sunday evening, I felt anxious about the week ahead. My chest would tighten when certain emails appeared in my inbox. Before meetings, I’d rehearse what I wanted to say over and over, trying to avoid saying the wrong thing. At the time, I blamed myself. I…
